King of Big Wheels

That's no moon

2006-09-25T08:02:00.000-04:00

www.kingofbigwheels.com is back from the dead. I might need to still do some last minute tweaking, but the new Death Star is fully operational.

Ammo for the mid-terms

2006-09-21T12:48:00.000-04:00

Find out who not to vote for:

20 Most Corrupt Members of Congress

Web update

2006-09-21T12:31:00.000-04:00

Made some progress last night on updating/securing my webserver. Still on target to have it up this weekend. I'm not sure if it will be available to all, but I should have it ready for testing.

Ales, and wenches, and grog. Arrrrrr!

2006-09-18T15:48:00.000-04:00

The name's Wicked John Barley, and this be Talk Like a Pirate Day.

or, at least blog like one.

if they had computers. and the internet.

EDIT: Just fer today, I'm sportin the "treasure map" look.

Keep to the Code!

Under construction

2006-09-17T20:37:00.000-04:00

Over the weekend, I started working on getting my old webserver up and running. I resurrected my Linux based firewall with intrusion detection, patched that, made some minor adjustments.

Booted the old server up (old as in - it's been turned off for 5 months!), everything still looks good. Upgraded to the latest software. Of course, that hosed a bunch of my original settings, so I have to go and reconfigure it again. No big deal.

Then, once the web server itself works, have to patch the blog software to the latest version, then correct any config changes that makes. So, lots of good progress this weekend. I'm guessing I should have everything running at this coming weekend's conclusion. But even then, have to do some testing before I go public.

Mashed Potatoes!

2006-09-15T07:46:00.000-04:00

Too F-ing funny!

CMS for KOBW, ROI or RIP?

2006-09-13T15:28:00.000-04:00

I've got this itch, like I need to get my old CMS / Blog server back up and running. Man, I miss that system. Polls, chat, photo gallery, built in blogroll. And a nifty logo to boot. ;-)

This free stuff is getting boring. But that's just it - I switched to Blogger cause it's free.

So, I've been browsing websites, trying to figure if I should keep the old system (cause all I did was shut the server off) or switch to some other snazzy app?

If I did decide to get it back up and running I'd:

Have to figure the cost to run it in house. Electricty costs mostly.
Compare to costs of having it hosted somewhere else (and then what? start with fresh content or try migrating the old data over?)
Compared to not spending anything at all and just keep this site.

My domain name came up for renewal. After the third reminder, I decided to renew it for another year...... just in case. Now that I did that, I'm getting all sentimental / reminiscent for the old site.

Dear kingofbigwheels.com:
How you been? Yeah, been a while since we spoke. You're probably still hurting from our last encounter. But, in your will, you stated you wanted to be kept on life support indefinately. So, technically, I could plug you back in and we'd have fun again. Just like old times.

Mine heart doth leap with joy

2006-09-11T07:54:00.000-04:00

The greatest sentence a toddler can speak to her father: "Daddy, can we watch Yoda?"

This weekend, I was doing the dishes and my daughter just blurted that out of no where. I was so happy, I was about to cry. I dried my hands, and we sat down to watch Empire.

Randal Graves: Which did you like better? "Jedi" or "The Empire Strikes Back?"
Dante Hicks: "Empire."
Randal Graves: Blasphemy.
Dante Hicks: "Empire" had the better ending. Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader is his father, uh, Han gets frozen, taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All "Jedi" had was a bunch of Muppets.

Top 100 American Beers

2006-09-06T12:10:00.000-04:00

Top 100 American Beers

I can honestly say I've had 10 of these. I've possibly had 2 or 3 others, can't remember.

Glad to see some local breweries on there - Dogfish Head and Victory.

No surprise

2006-09-02T14:45:00.000-04:00

We lost power again. This time for 16 hours. And it wasn't even raining yet.

I'm thinking of opening a savings account. So, when I get my utility bill for say $140, I pay them $1 each month, then put the other $139 into the savings account. I keep doing that until I move out of the house. Then, and only then, do I pay Delmarva the difference. I don't have a choice for my electric provider, but there has to be some way of F-ing with them.

PS - Rumor has it from someone who works at Delmarva: if your electric goes out at night, they wait until morning to dispatch crews. They don't want to pay overtime for night work. Nice.

DND

2006-08-25T08:50:00.000-04:00

I'll be on vacation starting 4pm today. May or may not blog. Please don't wait until Sept 5th with bated breath.... as if.

Dave 'the hammer' Schultz

2006-08-23T13:44:00.000-04:00

As a little kid, I remember listening with my parents to the Philadelphia Flyers in the Stanley Cup playoffs on the radio. This was 1975, I had just turned three. I don't remember a whole lot, mostly how the stereo looked and the living room we sat in. I do remember how excited my parents got listening to it. And that started my fascination with ice hockey. It's the only sport I like today. I love playing hockey. So, it's with a cool sneer that I am happy to present to you:

AskMen.com's Top 10 Intimidating Teams. Guess who made #1 baby?

McTheorum

2006-08-21T07:37:00.000-04:00

It's been bugging me for quite some time now, and this weekend I took action. I ordered 20 pieces of Chicken McNuggets from McDonald's, and I was right! There are only three distinct shapes for McNuggets. Yes, they look random and almost "natural". Let me tell you, there's nothing natural about grinding chicken parts down and squirting them into three different molds.

The round:

Nothing fancy, just circular. Diameter still fits into the dipping sauce container, but not too small either. Basically, looks like a mini version of the moon from that black and white movie with the "rocket ship" shoved in some guy's eye.

The diamond(?):

I don't know what this shape is. Sorta diamond shape, like the blue diamonds from Lucky Charms cereal. (When they used to have blue diamonds and not the 'disappears in milk' BS they have now... but that's another blog). Maybe this shape is kind of a shark fin? I dunno. Tastes like chicken.

The Gumby:

This is my favorite, and the one that tipped me off to the whole "there's only three nugget shapes" theory. I mean, look at it. What part of the chicken is that? That's Gumby dammit. Out of the 20 pieces I got, 10 of them were this shape. 10!

And out of the 20 pieces, they all fell into these three shapes. Granted, some were more deformed than others, but it was obvious. Here's something to think about for the day: imagine me sorting a box of chicken nuggets by shape so I can take digital pictures. To blog about. Cause there are the kinds of things that get stuck in my head for months at a time.

Applied Cryptography

2006-08-18T09:10:00.000-04:00

It's an inside Security Geek joke, and I like it.

Bruce Schneier Facts

which is based on Chuck Norris Facts

My favorite: When God needs a new secure certificate, he uses Bruce Schneier as the signing authority.

Quote of the day

2006-08-16T11:01:00.000-04:00

"self humiliation is both enlightening and humorous"

Post 50

2006-08-15T07:43:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Post #50. And in here, I'd like to make some rash generalizations and sweeping gestures. (I think there's a Boy George joke in there...sweeping gestures...anyway...)

1)Thanks for stepping all over my lifeless body. I threw myself at your feet with my pitiful story and you all ruin it with comments of "who's bob?", "bourbon", "hockey", "vodka", "who's ken?", "beer", and national security. I'm seeing a trend here..... alcoholics in search of other alcoholics.

2)On the flip side - whoa! I have 4 people reading (and commenting!) on my blog! Hello there! You know, when I ran my own server that had chat abilty, it ended up being just me posting "anyone there?". Nice.

3)Just kidding about point #1 there.

4)Rule Four, I don't want to catch anybody not drinking. Rule Five ..No Poofters!

5)Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. Continue commenting.

if it wasn't for you meddling kids

2006-08-11T07:41:00.000-04:00

I had this image in my head yesterday when I heard the news. Glad to see someone photoshopped my brainwaves.

In related news - why are they dumping "potentially explosive liquids" into one big trashcan in a crowded airport?

Rob Base STILL gets wimmen

2006-08-10T16:54:00.000-04:00

Ladies love me, girls adore me
I mean even the ones who never saw me

I took a half day off from work today. I spent the day like it was going out of style - I went to Hooters for lunch. And it never fails, I found out once again I AM A SOCIAL DORK.

I rarely eat out anymore, and even rarer do I go to Hooters. But, they have really good wings. The best I've had, and I like wings. Yeah, I know what you're thinking - the wings are good only because of the "atmosphere". No. Really. I get their frozen wings when I'm at the supermarket. They're that good.

So, I sat by myself eating a buffalo chicken sandwich - hot. And, as usual, the server pretty much completely ignores me. Coming from a hotel / restaurant management background, I'm constantly evaluating service anyway. It drives my wife crazy how many things I "report" on. Anyway, it all comes down to this:

Hot Girls Ignore Me

Even semi-hot girls.

Pretty much all girls for that matter.

Ok, there are some pointers here:
1) The service industry in general is more unresponsive than ever. It's a crock to even call it "service" anymore.
2) Hot chicks (or those that think they are hot) have it made. To be serving a married, spare tire wearing, no-wrinkle-khaki-pant sitting dude is probably beneath them.
3) I'm pretty oblivious to social situations. I generally avoid them at all cost. Now you can see why I left the "people" industry of hospitality management.

So, I set up myself up for failure. And yet, I'm suprised when no one talks to me. And by talking, I mean something other than "would you like fries?"

I even heard the "C" word today. Damn! A girl said I had a Cute smile. I even corrected her - DONT SAY THE C WORD. Of course, she changed her story, "oh, I didn't mean cute like a little boy". Yeah. Ok. I've been hearing that all my life, I know what the Cute word means. I didn't think at my age I'd still be "cute". I guess it could be worse, I could be "dirty old man".

Maybe the question should be - does anyone else have the expectation to have a conversation with a waitress / waiter in short shorts?

Your 9AM appointment

2006-08-08T15:55:00.000-04:00

While you are sipping your coffee, reading the day's news; I'll be attending a mandatory "office ergonomics" training session.

While you are playing solitare, Internet hearts, or World of Warcraft, I'll be forced to listen about how to adjust my chair, position my keyboard, and don't overstretch when using the mouse.

As you are deciding what to have for lunch, remember me as I am taunted by my peers for "not enough lumbar support".

Service roulette

2006-08-07T12:12:00.000-04:00

Spin the wheel, take a chance, see what happens. Lands on: cloudy, current temp 80 degrees. No storms. But, you still lose power. So sorry.

This is really pissing me off.

Career advancement that doesn't involve the word "brown"

2006-08-04T08:26:00.000-04:00

You're looking at the next CISM candidate. Don't you feel special?

I'm pursuing my next certification, the Certified Information Security Manager from ISACA. From now until December 9th, I'm going to be studying and preparing. Should be no problem. Almost all my other certs have been self taught, so I don't expect a problem with this one.

Exhaust fume funeral

2006-08-02T17:33:00.000-04:00

Why is it, as human beings, we feel it is much better to memorialize someone on the back of our car windshield when they are dead rather than just tell them in person how much we love them when they are alive?

It's ok that thousands of strangers in other vehicles know how you feel rather than the person you suddenly miss? Do those thousands of strangers really care?

Maintenance crew

2006-08-02T06:54:00.000-04:00

FYI - I pulled some posts down off the blog on purpose. Not because I feel any differently, but only because I gave away too much info in earlier posts. If you're a regular reader, you'll know what I mean. Sorry for being so cryptic.

pulling the covers back over my head

2006-07-31T11:39:00.000-04:00

"Let's save the human race, let's finish off the U.S. empire"

Can't we just go back to worrying about the Internet tubes?

what would Emily Post do?

2006-07-28T07:10:00.000-04:00

I'm without power again. Started sometime about 1am last night.

On my way into work this morning, drove past two utility trucks. They looked like they were enjoying their coffee. Good for them.